bin-files/generate-excuse.lisp

(defvar *first-column*
  '("Temporary" "Intermittant" "Partial" "Redundant" "Total" "Multiplexed"
    "Inherent" "Duplicated" "Dual-Homed" "Synchronous" "Bidirectional"
    "Serial" "Asynchronous" "Multiple" "Replicated" "Non-Replicated"
    "Unregistered" "Non-Specific" "Generic" "Migrated" "Localised" "Resignalled"
    "Dereferenced" "Nullified" "Aborted" "Serious" "Minor" "Major" "Extraneous"
    "Illegal" "Insufficient" "Viral" "Unsupported" "Outmoded" "Legacy" "Permanent"
    "Invalid" "Deprecated" "Virtual" "Unreportable" "Undetermined" "Undiagnosable"
    "Unfiltered" "Static" "Dynamic" "Delayed" "Immediate" "Nonfatal" "Fatal" "Non-Valid"
    "Unvalidated" "Non-Static" "Unreplicatable" "Non-Serious"))

(defvar *first-length* (length *first-column*))

(defvar *second-column*
  '("Array" "Systems" "Hardware" "Software" "Firmware" "Backplane" "Logic-Subsystem"
    "Integrity" "Subsystem" "Memory" "Comms" "Integrity" "Checksum" "Protocol" "Parity"
    "Bus" "Timing" "Synchronisation" "Topology" "Transmission" "Reception" "Stack"
    "Framing" "Code" "Programming" "Peripheral" "Environmental" "Loading" "Operation"
    "Parameter" "Syntax" "Initialisation" "Execution" "Resource" "Encryption" "Decryption"
    "File" "Precondition" "Authentication" "Paging" "Swapfile" "Service" "Gateway" "Request"
    "Proxy" "Media" "Registry" "Configuration" "Metadata" "Streaming" "Retrieval" "Installation"
    "Library" "Handler"))

(defvar *second-length* (length *second-column*))

(defvar *third-column*
  '("Interruption" "Destabilisation" "Destruction" "Desynchronisation" "Failure" "Dereferencing"
    "Overflow" "Underflow" "NMI" "Interrupt" "Corruption" "Anomoly" "Seizure" "Override" "Reclock"
    "Rejection" "Invalidation" "Halt" "Exhaustion" "Infection" "Incompatibility" "Timeout" "Expiry"
    "Unavailability" "Bug" "Condition" "Crash" "Dump" "Crashdump" "Stackdump" "Problem" "Lockout"))

(defvar *third-length* (length *third-column*))

(defvar *optional-fourth-column*
  '("Error" "Problem" "Warning" "Signal" "Flag"))

(defvar *fourth-length* (length *optional-fourth-column*))

(defvar *initialized-p* nil)

(defun ensure-positive (number)
  (if (< number 0)
      (- number)
      number))

(defun ensure-initialized ()
  (when (not *initialized-p*)
    (setq *random-state* (make-random-state t)
          *initialized-p* t)
    (dotimes (number (ensure-positive (random 100)))
      (dotimes (other (ensure-positive (random (1+ number))))
        (dotimes (yet-another (ensure-positive (random (1+ other))))
          (ensure-positive (random (1+ yet-another))))))))

(defun get-excuse (stream)
  (ensure-initialized)
  (let ((first-word (nth (ensure-positive (1- (random *first-length*))) *first-column*))
        (second-word (nth (ensure-positive (1- (random *second-length*))) *second-column*))
        (third-word (nth (ensure-positive (1- (random *third-length*))) *third-column*))
        (fourth-word (nth (ensure-positive (1- (random *fourth-length*))) *optional-fourth-column*)))
    (format stream "~a ~a ~a (~a)~%" first-word second-word third-word fourth-word)))

(defun main ()
  (let ((count (if (not (null (second *posix-argv*)))
                   (parse-integer (second *posix-argv*) :junk-allowed t)
                   1)))
    (dotimes (n count)
      (declare (ignorable n))
      (get-excuse *standard-output*))))